My-Oven-is-Duct-Taped-Together Lemon Parmesan Tilapia

I usually do my fish in the oven because I like to pretend it comes out healthier that way, regardless of the amount of butter I use, but remember my demon oven from the last post and how the door fell off into my hands? Well, that kamikaze door is currently duct taped to the stove so as to prevent the befooting of innocent passersby so, rendering it unable to kill, yet unusable to cook things. And it's too f-in' hot to use the thing this week anyway, so let's skillet up some fish!

Lemon Parmesan Tilapia

Here's What You're Gonna Need:

3-4 (or about a pound) tilapia fillets

1/3 cup Italian bread crumbs
3 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 tsp salt
black pepper to taste (optional)
zest of one or two lemons, or whatever you can get done before you zest yourself in the finger (I can't be the only one out there who does this). You can use a grater instead of azester-it's easier and the slightly larger size of the peel doesn't matter here.

3 tablespoons of butter
1 tablespoon olive oil

the lemons you de-zested

And Here's What You're Gonna Do:

Pat your fish dry with paper towels. Wash your fish hands then melt 2 tablespoons of that butter in the microwave. Be sure it explodes all over the place and makes a glorious mess, because then it looks like you worked really hard.*

In a shallow bowl combine bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, garlic salt, and lemon zest.

Heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of butter along with olive oil over medium high heat.

While the butter and oil are heating, brush the fish fillets with the 2 tablespoons of melted butter from before, then coat them with the breading.

Cook fillets for 2-4 minutes per side until the coating is a little crispy and the fish flakes easily with a fork. Squeeze some lemon on those bad boys and you're ready to go!

*The awesome thing is I was blogging about this recipe as I was making it, and while I was writing the part about the butter exploding all over the microwave I wasn't paying attention and my butter exploded all over the microwave. Awesome.

From my five year old who usually doesn't like fish: "Mommy, this is more delicious than all of the other healthy and unhealthy things you make! Except desert. It's not tastier than dessert."
From my two year old who usually doesn't like fish: "Noooooooooo!"
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Okay vegetarians who mourn the loss of bacon, you're gonna want to check out this new baconnaise shirt: http://www.zazzle.com/i_heart_baconnaise_tshirt-235860204719635714
It's awesome and proceeds go to Mercy Corps.

Sweet Potato and Black Bean Quesadilla

Sweet Potato and Black Bean Quesadilla

This makes one big ass quesadilla (enough for two people if served with sides) or a two to three normal size quesadillas

Here's what you're gonna need:

1 big sweet potato or 2 smaller ones

1/2 small onion, finely chopped

1 can cooked and rinsed black beans
a couple of shakes (1/8ish tsp) cumin (optional)*
a couple of shakes (1/8ish chili) powder*

1/4+ tsp cinnamon*
1/4+ tsp cayenne*

1 big ass flour or whole wheat tortilla, or 2-3 smaller ones

meltable cheese (queso fresco, monteray jack, and colby jack work well)

sour cream and/or slices of avocado for garnish (optional).

And here's what you're gonna do:

Cook up that sweet potato either by roasting it (tastes better) or nuking it (quicker). Either way, get it to a state where it is very easy to stab with your favorite kitchen stabbing devise. Leave it in the skin for now--the escaping steam will make it super easy to peel in a few minutes.

Saute the onions with a small amount of butter until they're translucent. Add the rinsed black beans, and season with cumin and chili powder. Keep it going over medium heat until the beans are warm and your kitchen smells kick-ass.

While the magic is happening in bean land, address your sweet potato. By now you should be able to just pop that bad boy out of its skin and into a bowl. Use a knife to split it open then squeeze / scoop the potato out if it's not cooperating. Now season it with cinnamon and cayenne and mash it up good with a fork or a potato masher.

Add the sweet potato to the pan with the black beans and fold it all together until it's mixed well and give the flavors a minute or two to blend. Here's where the * comes in. Wait for it...
*now sample the sweet potato and black bean mixture and adjust the seasoning to your taste. You can also add a pinch of salt here, if you like. I usually don't like.

While the innards are getting to know each other in the pan, address the outtards (new word). Heat the tortilla(s) in a small amount of butter in a skillet of appropriate size or on a griddle. Sprinkle on some cheese (it doesn't need that much). After it starts to get a little melty, spoon the sweet potato and black bean innards onto one side of the quesadilla. Fold the other half over the top of your creation, encourage stick togetherness by pushing on the top a little with your spatula, then slide it off onto a plate. Top with sour cream and avocados. Ta da!

Freezer Burritos and a Period made of gold

Been drinking soy milk. Still no improvement in the size of my boobs, but the last time I got my period it was made of gold.
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Here's a good recipe for burritos that you can made ahead of time and leave in the fridge until the next day or freeze until the day before you decide you're no longer a vegetarian.

1 cup of brown rice (cooled)
2 cans of black beans
1 can pinto beans
1/2 can whole kernel corn
1 can diced tomatoes and green chilies or an equal amount of salsa
as much cheese as your little heart desires
8-10 flour tortillas (the big ass kind)

Rinse and drain black beans and pinto beans. Put the black beans, pinto beans, corn and died tomatoes in a mixing bowl and mix it all up. Toss in the rice and cheese and mix it up again. Fill the tortillas up with the mixture and wrap those suckers up like burritos. If you want to freeze them, wrap them up in plastic wrap and put them in a freezer bag. You can also freeze the filling and the tortillas separately. Defrost them in the microwave when it's burrito time again. If you're going to eat your babies now, you can slap some sour cream on the tortilla first and add guacamole or just cut up avocados--that stuff doesn't freeze well, though, so if you want it on the frozen ones you're going to have to add it after they thaw.